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Commander
When Golos, Tireless Pilgrim enters the battlefield, you may search your library for a land card, put that card onto the battlefield tapped, then shuffle. {2}{W}{U}{B}{R}{G}: Exile the top three cards of your library. You may play them this turn without paying their mana costs.
Hidden agenda (Start the game with this conspiracy face down in the command zone and secretly choose a card name. You may turn this conspiracy face up any time and reveal that name.) Creatures you control with the chosen name have "{T}: Add one mana of any color."
Card Advantage
As Buzzing Whack-a-Doodle enters the battlefield, you and an opponent each secretly choose Whack or Doodle. Then those choices are revealed. If the choices match, Buzzing Whack-a-Doodle has that ability. Otherwise, it has Buzz. • Whack — {T}: Target player loses 2 life. • Doodle — {T}: You gain 3 life. • Buzz — {2}, {T}: Draw a card.
When Split Screen enters the battlefield, shuffle your library and deal it into four libraries. If anything refers to your library, choose one of your libraries for it. Play with your libraries' top cards revealed. When Split Screen leaves the battlefield, shuffle your libraries together.
{5}, {T}: Shuffle your library, then reveal the top card. Until end of turn, for as long as that card remains on top of your library, play with the top card of your library revealed and you may play that card without paying its mana cost. (If it has X in its mana cost, X is 0.)
Creature
Whenever you cast a silver-bordered spell, put a +1/+1 counter on Border Guardian. Whenever you cast a black-bordered spell, Border Guardian can't be blocked this turn. Whenever you cast a white-bordered spell, Border Guardian gains double strike until end of turn.
Whenever an opponent casts a spell, you have five seconds to choose a keyword you haven't chosen for a card named Modular Monstrosity today that's been printed on a creature card. If you do, Modular Monstrosity gains that ability. Otherwise, Modular Monstrosity loses all keyword abilities.
Flying, indestructible When Puresteel Angel enters the battlefield, exile all artifacts that aren't colorless. Whenever Puresteel Angel deals combat damage to a player, you get an emblem with "If you would lose the game, instead your life total becomes 20, shuffle your graveyard into your library, you lose all poison counters, and you lose this emblem."
Equipped creature gets +2/+2 and has protection from Rogues and from Clerics. Whenever equipped creature deals combat damage to a player, create a 4/4 gold Dragon creature token with flying and roll a d20 (a twenty-sided die). If you roll a 20, repeat this process. Equip {2}
As Water Gun Balloon Game enters the battlefield, each player puts a pop! counter on "0." Whenever a player casts a spell, move that player's pop! counter up one. Whenever a player's pop! counter hits "5," that player creates a 5/5 pink Giant Teddy Bear creature token and resets all pop! counters to "0."
General Fuckery
{T}: Add one mana of any color. {1}, {T}: Say the flavor text on a card in your hand. Target opponent guesses that card's name. You may reveal that card. If you do and your opponent guessed wrong, draw a card. {8}, {T}: Everythingamajig deals 12 damage to target creature.
Land
At the beginning of your upkeep, if you control three or more artifacts, you gain 1 life. {T}: Add {C}. {4}, {T}, Sacrifice Inventors' Fair: Search your library for an artifact card, reveal it, put it into your hand, then shuffle. Activate only if you control three or more artifacts.
Mana Ramp
{X}, {T}: You may exile a nonland card from your hand. You may cast that card for as long as it remains exiled. Put a charge counter on Ice Cauldron and note the type and amount of mana spent to pay this activation cost. Activate only if there are no charge counters on Ice Cauldron. {T}, Remove a charge counter from Ice Cauldron: Add Ice Cauldron's last noted type and amount of mana. Spend this mana only to cast the last card exiled with Ice Cauldron.
Removal
Remove Bronze Tablet from your deck before playing if you're not playing for ante. Bronze Tablet enters the battlefield tapped. {4}, {T}: Exile Bronze Tablet and target nontoken permanent an opponent owns. That player may pay 10 life. If they do, put Bronze Tablet into its owner's graveyard. Otherwise, that player owns Bronze Tablet and you own the other exiled card.
During your turn, if Entirely Normal Armchair is in your hand, you may hide it on the battlefield. {0}: Return Entirely Normal Armchair to its owner's hand. Only your opponents may activate this ability and only if they see Entirely Normal Armchair. {2}, Sacrifice Entirely Normal Armchair: Destroy target attacking creature.
Colorless spells you cast cost {2} less to cast. +1: Exile the top card of your library face down and look at it. Create a 2/2 colorless Spirit creature token. When that token leaves the battlefield, put the exiled card into your hand. −3: Destroy target permanent that's one or more colors.
Wincons
This spell can't be countered. When you cast this spell, take an extra turn after this one. Flying, protection from spells that are one or more colors, annihilator 6 When Emrakul, the Aeons Torn is put into a graveyard from anywhere, its owner shuffles their graveyard into their library.