263
2/4/2020
PENIS INSPECTION DAY II: THE SEARCH FOR MORE PENIS
Deck Size: 100
Commander / EDH
Legal
Est deck cost: $647.76
Salt Sum: 55.84
No deck tags
263
2/4/2020
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Commander

Quantity: 1Price: $0.99
Emry, Lurker of the Loch

This spell costs {1} less to cast for each artifact you control. When Emry, Lurker of the Loch enters the battlefield, mill four cards. {T}: Choose target artifact card in your graveyard. You may cast that card this turn. (You still pay its costs. Timing rules still apply.)

Creature
Emry, Lurker of the Loch (eld) 43
1

Cost Reduction

Quantity: 3Price: $6.77
Etherium Sculptor

Artifact spells you cast cost {1} less to cast.

Creature Artifact
Etherium Sculptor (c18) 90
1
Helm of Awakening

Spells cost {1} less to cast.

Artifact
Helm of Awakening (plst) VIS-145
1
Ugin, the Ineffable

Colorless spells you cast cost {2} less to cast. +1: Exile the top card of your library face down and look at it. Create a 2/2 colorless Spirit creature token. When that token leaves the battlefield, put the exiled card into your hand. −3: Destroy target permanent that's one or more colors.

Planeswalker
Ugin, the Ineffable (war) 2
1

Disruption

Quantity: 10Price: $76.26
Capsize

Buyback {3} (You may pay an additional {3} as you cast this spell. If you do, put this card into your hand as it resolves.) Return target permanent to its owner's hand.

Instant
Capsize (tmp) 55
1
Coastal Breach

Undaunted (This spell costs {1} less to cast for each opponent.) Return all nonland permanents to their owners' hands.

Sorcery
Coastal Breach (c16) 6
1
Counterspell

Counter target spell.

Instant
Counterspell (3ed) 54
1
Cyclonic Rift

Return target nonland permanent you don't control to its owner's hand. Overload {6}{U} (You may cast this spell for its overload cost. If you do, change "target" in its text to "each.")

Instant
Cyclonic Rift (mm3) 35
1
Flood of Tears

Return all nonland permanents to their owners' hands. If you return four or more nontoken permanents you control this way, you may put a permanent card from your hand onto the battlefield.

Sorcery
Flood of Tears (m20) 59
1
Imprisoned in the Moon

Enchant creature, land, or planeswalker Enchanted permanent is a colorless land with "{T}: Add {C}" and loses all other card types and abilities.

Enchantment
Imprisoned in the Moon (emn) 65
1
Muddle the Mixture

Counter target instant or sorcery spell. Transmute {1}{U}{U} ({1}{U}{U}, Discard this card: Search your library for a card with the same mana value as this card, reveal it, put it into your hand, then shuffle. Transmute only as a sorcery.)

Instant
Muddle the Mixture (rav) 60
1
Negate

Counter target noncreature spell.

Instant
Negate (m12) 69
1
Reality Shift

Exile target creature. Its controller manifests the top card of their library. (That player puts the top card of their library onto the battlefield face down as a 2/2 creature. If it's a creature card, it can be turned face up any time for its mana cost.)

Instant
Reality Shift (frf) 46
1
Swan Song

Counter target enchantment, instant, or sorcery spell. Its controller creates a 2/2 blue Bird creature token with flying.

Instant
Swan Song (c16) 98
1

Draw

Quantity: 4Price: $13.32
Ichor Wellspring

When Ichor Wellspring enters the battlefield or is put into a graveyard from the battlefield, draw a card.

Artifact
Ichor Wellspring (cm2) 193
1
Riddlesmith

Whenever you cast an artifact spell, you may draw a card. If you do, discard a card.

Creature
Riddlesmith (ddu) 39
1
Sai, Master Thopterist

Whenever you cast an artifact spell, create a 1/1 colorless Thopter artifact creature token with flying. {1}{U}, Sacrifice two artifacts: Draw a card.

Creature
Sai, Master Thopterist (pm19) 69p
1
Vedalken Archmage

Whenever you cast an artifact spell, draw a card.

Creature
Vedalken Archmage (mrd) 55
1

Inspect Penis

Quantity: 5Price: $94.11
Field of Dreams

Players play with the top card of their libraries revealed.

Enchantment
Field of Dreams (leg) 55
1
Lantern of Insight

Players play with the top card of their libraries revealed. {T}, Sacrifice Lantern of Insight: Target player shuffles.

Artifact
Lantern of Insight (5dn) 135
1
Mishra's Bauble

{T}, Sacrifice Mishra's Bauble: Look at the top card of target player's library. Draw a card at the beginning of the next turn's upkeep.

Artifact
Mishra's Bauble (plst) IMA-221
1
Wizened Snitches

Flying Players play with the top card of their libraries revealed.

Creature
Wizened Snitches (rav) 75
1
Zur's Weirding

Players play with their hands revealed. If a player would draw a card, they reveal it instead. Then any other player may pay 2 life. If a player does, put that card into its owner's graveyard. Otherwise, that player draws a card.

Enchantment
Zur's Weirding (9ed) 114
1

Land

Quantity: 34Price: $194.38
Academy Ruins

{T}: Add {C}. {1}{U}, {T}: Put target artifact card from your graveyard on top of your library.

Land
Academy Ruins (mma) 219
1
Darksteel Citadel

Indestructible {T}: Add {C}.

Artifact Land
Darksteel Citadel (plst) MM2-238
1
Field of Ruin

{T}: Add {C}. {2}, {T}, Sacrifice Field of Ruin: Destroy target nonbasic land an opponent controls. Each player searches their library for a basic land card, puts it onto the battlefield, then shuffles.

Land
Field of Ruin (plst) XLN-254
1
Halimar Depths

Halimar Depths enters the battlefield tapped. When Halimar Depths enters the battlefield, look at the top three cards of your library, then put them back in any order. {T}: Add {U}.

Land
Halimar Depths (c18) 253
1
Inventors' Fair

At the beginning of your upkeep, if you control three or more artifacts, you gain 1 life. {T}: Add {C}. {4}, {T}, Sacrifice Inventors' Fair: Search your library for an artifact card, reveal it, put it into your hand, then shuffle. Activate only if you control three or more artifacts.

Land
Inventors' Fair (kld) 247
1
Island

({T}: Add {U}.)

Land
Island (eld) 254
21
Minamo, School at Water's Edge

{T}: Add {U}. {U}, {T}: Untap target legendary permanent.

Land
Minamo, School at Water's Edge (chk) 279
1
Nykthos, Shrine to Nyx

{T}: Add {C}. {2}, {T}: Choose a color. Add an amount of mana of that color equal to your devotion to that color. (Your devotion to a color is the number of mana symbols of that color in the mana costs of permanents you control.)

Land
Nykthos, Shrine to Nyx (ths) 223
1
Phyrexia's Core

{T}: Add {C}. {1}, {T}, Sacrifice an artifact: You gain 1 life.

Land
Phyrexia's Core (cm2) 261
1
Reliquary Tower

You have no maximum hand size. {T}: Add {C}.

Land
Reliquary Tower (plst) M19-254
1
Seat of the Synod

{T}: Add {U}.

Artifact Land
Seat of the Synod (c18) 278
1
Strip Mine

{T}: Add {C}. {T}, Sacrifice Strip Mine: Destroy target land.

Land
Strip Mine (ath) 77
1
Tolaria West

Tolaria West enters the battlefield tapped. {T}: Add {U}. Transmute {1}{U}{U} ({1}{U}{U}, Discard this card: Search your library for a card with mana value 0, reveal it, put it into your hand, then shuffle. Transmute only as a sorcery.)

Land
Tolaria West (fut) 173
1
Wasteland

{T}: Add {C}. {T}, Sacrifice Wasteland: Destroy target nonbasic land.

Land
Wasteland (ema) 248
1

Ramp

Quantity: 2Price: $1.58
Surveyor's Scope

{T}, Exile Surveyor's Scope: Search your library for up to X basic land cards, where X is the number of players who control at least two more lands than you. Put those cards onto the battlefield, then shuffle.

Artifact
Surveyor's Scope (cma) 232
1
Wayfarer's Bauble

{2}, {T}, Sacrifice Wayfarer's Bauble: Search your library for a basic land card, put that card onto the battlefield tapped, then shuffle.

Artifact
Wayfarer's Bauble (cm2) 229
1

Remove Penis

Quantity: 8Price: $14.20
Codex Shredder

{T}: Target player mills a card. (They put the top card of their library into their graveyard.) {5}, {T}, Sacrifice Codex Shredder: Return target card from your graveyard to your hand.

Artifact
Codex Shredder (rtr) 228
1
Diligent Excavator

Whenever you cast a historic spell, target player mills two cards. (Artifacts, legendaries, and Sagas are historic.)

Creature
Diligent Excavator (dom) 51
1
Grinding Station

{T}, Sacrifice an artifact: Target player mills three cards. Whenever an artifact enters the battlefield, you may untap Grinding Station.

Artifact
Grinding Station (5dn) 127
1
Mindshrieker

Flying {2}: Target player mills a card. Mindshrieker gets +X/+X until end of turn, where X is the milled card's mana value.

Creature
Mindshrieker (isd) 67
1
Psychic Surgery

Whenever an opponent shuffles their library, you may look at the top two cards of that library. You may exile one of those cards. Then put the rest on top of that library in any order.

Enchantment
Psychic Surgery (nph) 44
1
Pyxis of Pandemonium

{T}: Each player exiles the top card of their library face down. {7}, {T}, Sacrifice Pyxis of Pandemonium: Each player turns face up all cards they own exiled with Pyxis of Pandemonium, then puts all permanent cards among them onto the battlefield.

Artifact
Pyxis of Pandemonium (ths) 220
1
Thought Harvester

Devoid (This card has no color.) Flying Whenever you cast a colorless spell, target opponent exiles the top card of their library.

Creature
Thought Harvester (ogw) 48
1
Wand of Denial

{T}: Look at the top card of target player's library. If it's a nonland card, you may pay 2 life. If you do, put it into that player's graveyard.

Artifact
Wand of Denial (6ed) 317
1

Rocks

Quantity: 7Price: $11.73
Arcane Signet

{T}: Add one mana of any color in your commander's color identity.

Artifact
Arcane Signet (eld) 331
1
Coldsteel Heart

Coldsteel Heart enters the battlefield tapped. As Coldsteel Heart enters the battlefield, choose a color. {T}: Add one mana of the chosen color.

Artifact
Coldsteel Heart (plst) CM2-181
1
Everflowing Chalice

Multikicker {2} (You may pay an additional {2} any number of times as you cast this spell.) Everflowing Chalice enters the battlefield with a charge counter on it for each time it was kicked. {T}: Add {C} for each charge counter on Everflowing Chalice.

Artifact
Everflowing Chalice (cm2) 188
1
Mind Stone

{T}: Add {C}. {1}, {T}, Sacrifice Mind Stone: Draw a card.

Artifact
Mind Stone (plst) C18-210
1
Prismatic Lens

{T}: Add {C}. {1}, {T}: Add one mana of any color.

Artifact
Prismatic Lens (uma) 234
1
Sol Ring

{T}: Add {C}{C}.

Artifact
Sol Ring (pf19) 7
1
Thought Vessel

You have no maximum hand size. {T}: Add {C}.

Artifact
Thought Vessel (cm2) 224
1

Stack Yr Deck

Quantity: 4Price: $36.12
Artificer's Assistant

Flying Whenever you cast a historic spell, scry 1. (Artifacts, legendaries, and Sagas are historic. To scry 1, look at the top card of your library, then you may put that card on the bottom of your library.)

Creature
Artificer's Assistant (dom) 44
1
Brainstorm

Draw three cards, then put two cards from your hand on top of your library in any order.

Instant
Brainstorm (cst) 61
1
Ponder

Look at the top three cards of your library, then put them back in any order. You may shuffle. Draw a card.

Sorcery
Ponder (m12) 73
1
Sensei's Divining Top

{1}: Look at the top three cards of your library, then put them back in any order. {T}: Draw a card, then put Sensei's Divining Top on top of its owner's library.

Artifact
Sensei's Divining Top (ema) 232
1

Tutors

Quantity: 7Price: $18.73
Artificer's Intuition

{U}, Discard an artifact card: Search your library for an artifact card with mana value 1 or less, reveal it, put it into your hand, then shuffle.

Enchantment
Artificer's Intuition (5dn) 23
1
Drift of Phantasms

Defender (This creature can't attack.) Flying Transmute {1}{U}{U} ({1}{U}{U}, Discard this card: Search your library for a card with the same mana value as this card, reveal it, put it into your hand, then shuffle. Transmute only as a sorcery.)

Creature
Drift of Phantasms (rav) 46
1
Fabricate

Search your library for an artifact card, reveal it, put it into your hand, then shuffle.

Sorcery
Fabricate (hop) 9
1
Long-Term Plans

Search your library for a card, then shuffle and put that card third from the top.

Instant
Long-Term Plans (scg) 38
1
Tribute Mage

When Tribute Mage enters the battlefield, you may search your library for an artifact card with mana value 2, reveal that card, put it into your hand, then shuffle.

Creature
Tribute Mage (mh1) 73
1
Trinket Mage

When Trinket Mage enters the battlefield, you may search your library for an artifact card with mana value 1 or less, reveal that card, put it into your hand, then shuffle.

Creature
Trinket Mage (ddu) 41
1
Whir of Invention

Improvise (Your artifacts can help cast this spell. Each artifact you tap after you're done activating mana abilities pays for {1}.) Search your library for an artifact card with mana value X or less, put it onto the battlefield, then shuffle.

Instant
Whir of Invention (aer) 49
1

Utility

Quantity: 8Price: $77.78
Crucible of Worlds

You may play lands from your graveyard.

Artifact
Crucible of Worlds (m19) 229
1
Ensnaring Bridge

Creatures with power greater than the number of cards in your hand can't attack.

Artifact
Ensnaring Bridge (a25) 224
1
Lightning Greaves

Equipped creature has haste and shroud. (It can't be the target of spells or abilities.) Equip {0}

Artifact
Lightning Greaves (plst) C19-217
1
Mystic Forge

You may look at the top card of your library any time. You may cast artifact spells and colorless spells from the top of your library. {T}, Pay 1 life: Exile the top card of your library.

Artifact
Mystic Forge (m20) 233
1
Soul-Guide Lantern

When Soul-Guide Lantern enters the battlefield, exile target card from a graveyard. {T}, Sacrifice Soul-Guide Lantern: Exile each opponent's graveyard. {1}, {T}, Sacrifice Soul-Guide Lantern: Draw a card.

Artifact
Soul-Guide Lantern (thb) 237
1
Swiftfoot Boots

Equipped creature has hexproof and haste. (It can't be the target of spells or abilities your opponents control.) Equip {1}

Artifact
Swiftfoot Boots (c18) 225
1
Thousand-Year Elixir

You may activate abilities of creatures you control as though those creatures had haste. {1}, {T}: Untap target creature.

Artifact
Thousand-Year Elixir (cma) 236
1
Tormod's Crypt

{T}, Sacrifice Tormod's Crypt: Exile target player's graveyard.

Artifact
Tormod's Crypt (tsb) 115
1

Win Conditions

Quantity: 7Price: $101.79
Efficient Construction

Whenever you cast an artifact spell, create a 1/1 colorless Thopter artifact creature token with flying.

Enchantment
Efficient Construction (aer) 33
1
Jace, Wielder of Mysteries

If you would draw a card while your library has no cards in it, you win the game instead. +1: Target player mills two cards. Draw a card. −8: Draw seven cards. Then if your library has no cards in it, you win the game.

Planeswalker
Jace, Wielder of Mysteries (war) 54
1
Krark-Clan Ironworks

Sacrifice an artifact: Add {C}{C}.

Artifact
Krark-Clan Ironworks (5dn) 134
1
Lotus Petal

{T}, Sacrifice Lotus Petal: Add one mana of any color.

Artifact
Lotus Petal (plst) TMP-294
1
Mirran Spy

Flying Whenever you cast an artifact spell, you may untap target creature.

Creature
Mirran Spy (mbs) 26
1
Mirrodin Besieged

As Mirrodin Besieged enters the battlefield, choose Mirran or Phyrexian. • Mirran — Whenever you cast an artifact spell, create a 1/1 colorless Myr artifact creature token. • Phyrexian — At the beginning of your end step, draw a card, then discard a card. Then if there are fifteen or more artifact cards in your graveyard, target opponent loses the game.

Enchantment
Mirrodin Besieged (mh1) 57
1
Thassa's Oracle

When Thassa's Oracle enters the battlefield, look at the top X cards of your library, where X is your devotion to blue. Put up to one of them on top of your library and the rest on the bottom of your library in a random order. If X is greater than or equal to the number of cards in your library, you win the game. (Each {U} in the mana costs of permanents you control counts toward your devotion to blue.)

Creature
Thassa's Oracle (pthb) 73p
1

Maybeboard

Quantity: 37Price: $463.60
Aetherize

Return all attacking creatures to their owner's hand.

Instant
Aetherize (ima) 40
1
Arcum's Astrolabe

({S} can be paid with one mana from a snow source.) When Arcum's Astrolabe enters the battlefield, draw a card. {1}, {T}: Add one mana of any color.

Artifact
Arcum's Astrolabe (mh1) 220
1
Burnished Hart

{3}, Sacrifice Burnished Hart: Search your library for up to two basic land cards, put them onto the battlefield tapped, then shuffle.

Creature Artifact
Burnished Hart (c19) 211
1
Corridor Monitor

When Corridor Monitor enters the battlefield, untap target artifact or creature you control.

Creature Artifact
Corridor Monitor (eld) 41
1
Crashing Drawbridge

Defender {T}: Creatures you control gain haste until end of turn.

Creature Artifact
Crashing Drawbridge (eld) 217
1
Deny the Divine

Counter target creature or enchantment spell. If that spell is countered this way, exile it instead of putting it into its owner's graveyard.

Instant
Deny the Divine (thb) 47
1
Devastation Tide

Return all nonland permanents to their owners' hands. Miracle {1}{U} (You may cast this card for its miracle cost when you draw it if it's the first card you drew this turn.)

Sorcery
Devastation Tide (c18) 85
1
Dissipate

Counter target spell. If that spell is countered this way, exile it instead of putting it into its owner's graveyard.

Instant
Dissipate (m15) 51
1
Drafna's Restoration

Put any number of target artifact cards from target player's graveyard on top of their library in any order.

Sorcery
Drafna's Restoration (atq) 8
1
Drowned Secrets

Whenever you cast a blue spell, target player mills two cards.

Enchantment
Drowned Secrets (grn) 39
1
Evacuation

Return all creatures to their owners' hands.

Instant
Evacuation (c16) 91
1
Extruder

Echo {4} (At the beginning of your upkeep, if this came under your control since the beginning of your last upkeep, sacrifice it unless you pay its echo cost.) Sacrifice an artifact: Put a +1/+1 counter on target creature.

Creature Artifact
Extruder (uds) 130
1
Force of Negation

If it's not your turn, you may exile a blue card from your hand rather than pay this spell's mana cost. Counter target noncreature spell. If that spell is countered this way, exile it instead of putting it into its owner's graveyard.

Instant
Force of Negation (mh1) 52
1
Glint-Nest Crane

Flying When Glint-Nest Crane enters the battlefield, look at the top four cards of your library. You may reveal an artifact card from among them and put it into your hand. Put the rest on the bottom of your library in any order.

Creature
Glint-Nest Crane (kld) 50
1
Heap Doll

Sacrifice Heap Doll: Exile target card from a graveyard.

Creature Artifact
Heap Doll (uma) 228
1
Intuition

Search your library for three cards and reveal them. Target opponent chooses one. Put that card into your hand and the rest into your graveyard. Then shuffle.

Instant
Intuition (tmp) 70
1
Kuldotha Forgemaster

{T}, Sacrifice three artifacts: Search your library for an artifact card, put it onto the battlefield, then shuffle.

Creature Artifact
Kuldotha Forgemaster (td2) 14
1
Leyline of Anticipation

If Leyline of Anticipation is in your opening hand, you may begin the game with it on the battlefield. You may cast spells as though they had flash.

Enchantment
Leyline of Anticipation (m20) 64
1
Magewright's Stone

{1}, {T}: Untap target creature that has an activated ability with {T} in its cost.

Artifact
Magewright's Stone (dis) 162
1
Merchant Scroll

Search your library for a blue instant card, reveal that card, put it into your hand, then shuffle.

Sorcery
Merchant Scroll (8ed) 91
1
Mox Amber

{T}: Add one mana of any color among legendary creatures and planeswalkers you control.

Artifact
Mox Amber (dom) 224
1
Mox Opal

Metalcraft — {T}: Add one mana of any color. Activate only if you control three or more artifacts.

Artifact
Mox Opal (mm2) 223
1
Muzzio, Visionary Architect

{3}{U}, {T}: Look at the top X cards of your library, where X is the highest mana value among artifacts you control. You may put an artifact card from among them onto the battlefield. Put the rest on the bottom of your library in any order.

Creature
Muzzio, Visionary Architect (cns) 23
1
Narset, Parter of Veils

Each opponent can't draw more than one card each turn. −2: Look at the top four cards of your library. You may reveal a noncreature, nonland card from among them and put it into your hand. Put the rest on the bottom of your library in a random order.

Planeswalker
Narset, Parter of Veils (war) 61
1
Orbs of Warding

You have hexproof. (You can't be the target of spells or abilities your opponents control.) If a creature would deal damage to you, prevent 1 of that damage.

Artifact
Orbs of Warding (ori) 234
1
Padeem, Consul of Innovation

Artifacts you control have hexproof. At the beginning of your upkeep, if you control the artifact with the highest mana value or tied for the highest mana value, draw a card.

Creature
Padeem, Consul of Innovation (kld) 59
1
Pongify

Destroy target creature. It can't be regenerated. Its controller creates a 3/3 green Ape creature token.

Instant
Pongify (c14) 120
1
Rebuild

Return all artifacts to their owners' hands. Cycling {2} ({2}, Discard this card: Draw a card.)

Instant
Rebuild (mh1) 66
1
Relic of Progenitus

{T}: Target player exiles a card from their graveyard. {1}, Exile Relic of Progenitus: Exile all graveyards. Draw a card.

Artifact
Relic of Progenitus (ema) 231
1
Reshape

As an additional cost to cast this spell, sacrifice an artifact. Search your library for an artifact card with mana value X or less, put it onto the battlefield, then shuffle.

Sorcery
Reshape (dst) 31
1
Retract

Return all artifacts you control to their owner's hand.

Instant
Retract (dst) 32
1
Rhystic Study

Whenever an opponent casts a spell, you may draw a card unless that player pays {1}.

Enchantment
Rhystic Study (plst) PCY-45
1
Sage of Lat-Nam

{T}, Sacrifice an artifact: Draw a card.

Creature
Sage of Lat-Nam (plst) DOM-64
1
Salvager of Ruin

Sacrifice Salvager of Ruin: Choose target permanent card in your graveyard that was put there from the battlefield this turn. Return it to your hand.

Creature Artifact
Salvager of Ruin (m20) 237
1
Swiftfoot Boots

Equipped creature has hexproof and haste. (It can't be the target of spells or abilities your opponents control.) Equip {1}

Artifact
Swiftfoot Boots (c18) 225
1
Vedalken Orrery

You may cast spells as though they had flash.

Artifact
Vedalken Orrery (cns) 206
1
Witchbane Orb

When Witchbane Orb enters the battlefield, destroy all Curses attached to you. You have hexproof. (You can't be the target of spells or abilities your opponents control, including Aura spells.)

Artifact
Witchbane Orb (isd) 236
1

Deck Stats

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Description

{"ops":[{"insert":"Second revision of my Lantern Control list. I cut the "},{"insert":{"card-link":"Future Sight"}},{"insert":" combo in favor of relying on "},{"insert":{"card-link":"Mirran Spy"}},{"insert":"/"},{"insert":{"card-link":"Chakram Retriever"}},{"insert":" loops with Emry. Wincon list to come. WORK IN PROGRESS!!\n"}]}
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