116
8/3/2023
Funkiest part of Uptown
Deck Size: 100
Commander / EDH
Legal
Est deck cost: $213.62
Salt Sum: 46.51
No deck tags
116
8/3/2023
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Commander

Quantity: 1Price: $0.99
Parnesse, the Subtle Brush

Whenever you or a permanent you control becomes the target of a spell or ability an opponent controls, counter that spell or ability unless that player pays 4 life. Whenever you copy a spell, up to one target opponent may also copy that spell. They may choose new targets for that copy.

Creature
Parnesse, the Subtle Brush (ncc) 8
1

Artifact

Quantity: 5Price: $11.65
Arcane Signet

{T}: Add one mana of any color in your commander's color identity.

Artifact
Arcane Signet (cmm) 367
1
God-Pharaoh's Statue

Spells your opponents cast cost {2} more to cast. At the beginning of your end step, each opponent loses 1 life.

Artifact
God-Pharaoh's Statue (war) 238
1
Relic of Sauron

{T}: Add two mana in any combination of {U}, {B}, and/or {R}. {3}, {T}: Draw two cards, then discard a card.

Artifact
Relic of Sauron (ltc) 159
1
Sol Ring

{T}: Add {C}{C}.

Artifact
Sol Ring (cmm) 410
1
Visage of Bolas

When Visage of Bolas enters the battlefield, you may search your library and/or graveyard for a card named Nicol Bolas, the Deceiver, reveal it, and put it into your hand. If you search your library this way, shuffle. {T}: Add {U}, {B}, or {R}.

Artifact
Visage of Bolas (hou) 208
1

Creature

Quantity: 19Price: $83.09
Anger

Haste As long as Anger is in your graveyard and you control a Mountain, creatures you control have haste.

Creature
Anger (afc) 113
1
Cavern-Hoard Dragon

This spell costs {X} less to cast, where X is the greatest number of artifacts an opponent controls. Flying, trample, haste Whenever Cavern-Hoard Dragon deals combat damage to a player, you create a Treasure token for each artifact that player controls.

Creature
Cavern-Hoard Dragon (ltc) 114
1
Corsairs of Umbar

{2}{U}: Target Goblin, Orc, or Pirate can't be blocked this turn. Whenever Corsairs of Umbar deals combat damage to a player, amass Orcs 3. (Put three +1/+1 counters on an Army you control. It's also an Orc. If you don't control an Army, create a 0/0 black Orc Army creature token first.)

Creature
Corsairs of Umbar (ltc) 102
1
Goblin Electromancer

Instant and sorcery spells you cast cost {1} less to cast.

Creature
Goblin Electromancer (ncc) 341
1
Gríma, Saruman's Footman

Gríma, Saruman's Footman can't be blocked. Whenever Gríma deals combat damage to a player, that player exiles cards from the top of their library until they exile an instant or sorcery card. You may cast that card without paying its mana cost. Then that player puts the exiled cards that weren't cast this way on the bottom of their library in a random order.

Creature
Gríma, Saruman's Footman (ltc) 57
1
Guttersnipe

Whenever you cast an instant or sorcery spell, Guttersnipe deals 2 damage to each opponent.

Creature
Guttersnipe (cmm) 229
1
Jin-Gitaxias, Progress Tyrant

Whenever you cast an artifact, instant, or sorcery spell, copy that spell. You may choose new targets for the copy. This ability triggers only once each turn. (A copy of a permanent spell becomes a token.) Whenever an opponent casts an artifact, instant, or sorcery spell, counter that spell. This ability triggers only once each turn.

Creature
Jin-Gitaxias, Progress Tyrant (neo) 59
1
Lazotep Sliver

Sliver creatures you control have afflict 2. (Whenever a creature with afflict 2 becomes blocked, defending player loses 2 life.) Whenever a nontoken Sliver you control dies, amass Slivers 2. (Put two +1/+1 counters on an Army you control. It's also a Sliver. If you don't control an Army, create a 0/0 black Sliver Army creature token first.)

Creature
Lazotep Sliver (cmm) 733
1
Lord of the Nazgûl

Flying Wraiths you control have protection from Ring-bearers. Whenever you cast an instant or sorcery spell, create a 3/3 black Wraith creature token with menace. Then if you control nine or more Wraiths, Wraiths you control have base power and toughness 9/9 until end of turn.

Creature
Lord of the Nazgûl (ltc) 142
1
Neheb, the Eternal

Afflict 3 (Whenever this creature becomes blocked, defending player loses 3 life.) At the beginning of your postcombat main phase, add {R} for each 1 life your opponents have lost this turn.

Creature
Neheb, the Eternal (cmm) 244
1
Saruman the White

Ward {2} Whenever you cast your second spell each turn, amass Orcs 2. (Put two +1/+1 counters on an Army you control. It's also an Orc. If you don't control an Army, create a 0/0 black Orc Army creature token first.)

Creature
Saruman the White (ltr) 67
1
Saruman, the White Hand

Whenever you cast a noncreature spell, amass Orcs X, where X is that spell's mana value. (Put X +1/+1 counters on an Army you control. It's also an Orc. If you don't control an Army, create a 0/0 black Orc Army creature token first.) Goblins and Orcs you control have ward {2}.

Creature
Saruman, the White Hand (ltc) 8
1
Sauron, Lord of the Rings

When you cast this spell, amass Orcs 5, mill five cards, then return a creature card from your graveyard to the battlefield. Trample Whenever a commander an opponent controls dies, the Ring tempts you.

Creature
Sauron, Lord of the Rings (ltc) 4
1
Sauron, the Dark Lord

Ward—Sacrifice a legendary artifact or legendary creature. Whenever an opponent casts a spell, amass Orcs 1. Whenever an Army you control deals combat damage to a player, the Ring tempts you. Whenever the Ring tempts you, you may discard your hand. If you do, draw four cards.

Creature
Sauron, the Dark Lord (ltr) 329
1
The Balrog of Moria

Trample, haste When The Balrog of Moria dies, you may exile it. When you do, for each opponent, exile up to one target creature that player controls. Cycling {3}{R} ({3}{R}, Discard this card: Draw a card.) When you cycle The Balrog of Moria, create two Treasure tokens.

Creature
The Balrog of Moria (ltc) 129
1
The Locust God

Flying Whenever you draw a card, create a 1/1 blue and red Insect creature token with flying and haste. {2}{U}{R}: Draw a card, then discard a card. When The Locust God dies, return it to its owner's hand at the beginning of the next end step.

Creature
The Locust God (moc) 335
1
The Scorpion God

Whenever a creature with a -1/-1 counter on it dies, draw a card. {1}{B}{R}: Put a -1/-1 counter on another target creature. When The Scorpion God dies, return it to its owner's hand at the beginning of the next end step.

Creature
The Scorpion God (hou) 146
1
Wildfire Eternal

Afflict 4 (Whenever this creature becomes blocked, defending player loses 4 life.) Whenever Wildfire Eternal attacks and isn't blocked, you may cast an instant or sorcery spell from your hand without paying its mana cost.

Creature
Wildfire Eternal (hou) 109
1
Witch-king of Angmar

Flying Whenever one or more creatures deal combat damage to you, each opponent sacrifices a creature that dealt combat damage to you this turn. The Ring tempts you. Discard a card: Witch-king of Angmar gains indestructible until end of turn. Tap it.

Creature
Witch-king of Angmar (ltr) 311
1

Enchantment

Quantity: 10Price: $23.98
As Foretold

At the beginning of your upkeep, put a time counter on As Foretold. Once each turn, you may pay {0} rather than pay the mana cost for a spell you cast with mana value X or less, where X is the number of time counters on As Foretold.

Enchantment
As Foretold (2x2) 38
1
Blood Reckoning

Whenever a creature attacks you or a planeswalker you control, that creature's controller loses 1 life.

Enchantment
Blood Reckoning (m13) 81
1
Book of Mazarbul

(As this Saga enters and after your draw step, add a lore counter. Sacrifice after III.) I — Amass Orcs 1. (Put a +1/+1 counter on an Army you control. It's also an Orc. If you don't control an Army, create a 0/0 black Orc Army creature token first.) II — Amass Orcs 2. III — Creatures you control get +1/+0 and gain menace until end of turn.

Enchantment
Book of Mazarbul (ltr) 116
1
Call of the Ring

At the beginning of your upkeep, the Ring tempts you. Whenever you choose a creature as your Ring-bearer, you may pay 2 life. If you do, draw a card.

Enchantment
Call of the Ring (ltr) 79
1
Fall of Cair Andros

Whenever a creature an opponent controls is dealt excess noncombat damage, amass Orcs X, where X is that excess damage. (Put X +1/+1 counters on an Army you control. It's also an Orc. If you don't control an Army, create a 0/0 black Orc Army creature token first.) {7}{R}: Fall of Cair Andros deals 7 damage to target creature.

Enchantment
Fall of Cair Andros (ltr) 124
1
Fiery Inscription

When Fiery Inscription enters the battlefield, the Ring tempts you. Whenever you cast an instant or sorcery spell, Fiery Inscription deals 2 damage to each opponent.

Enchantment
Fiery Inscription (ltr) 126
1
March from the Black Gate

When March from the Black Gate enters the battlefield and whenever an Army you control attacks, amass Orcs 1. (Put a +1/+1 counter on an Army you control. It's also an Orc. If you don't control an Army, create a 0/0 black Orc Army creature token first.)

Enchantment
March from the Black Gate (ltr) 94
1
Omniscience

You may cast spells from your hand without paying their mana costs.

Enchantment
Omniscience (m19) 65
1
Patient Rebuilding

At the beginning of your upkeep, target opponent mills three cards, then you draw a card for each land card put into their graveyard this way.

Enchantment
Patient Rebuilding (m19) 67
1
Storm of Saruman

Ward {3} Whenever you cast your second spell each turn, copy it, except the copy isn't legendary. You may choose new targets for the copy. (A copy of a permanent spell becomes a token.)

Enchantment
Storm of Saruman (ltr) 413
1

Instant

Quantity: 9Price: $14.59
Arcane Denial

Counter target spell. Its controller may draw up to two cards at the beginning of the next turn's upkeep. You draw a card at the beginning of the next turn's upkeep.

Instant
Arcane Denial (voc) 102
1
Chaos Warp

The owner of target permanent shuffles it into their library, then reveals the top card of their library. If it's a permanent card, they put it onto the battlefield.

Instant
Chaos Warp (moc) 273
1
Commence the Endgame

This spell can't be countered. Draw two cards, then amass Zombies X, where X is the number of cards in your hand. (Put X +1/+1 counters on an Army you control. It's also a Zombie. If you don't control an Army, create a 0/0 black Zombie Army creature token first.)

Instant
Commence the Endgame (war) 45
1
Counterspell

Counter target spell.

Instant
Counterspell (cmm) 81
1
Dark Ritual

Add {B}{B}{B}.

Instant
Dark Ritual (plst) DDE-18
1
Fact or Fiction

Reveal the top five cards of your library. An opponent separates those cards into two piles. Put one pile into your hand and the other into your graveyard.

Instant
Fact or Fiction (cmm) 91
1
Lazotep Plating

Amass Zombies 1. (Put a +1/+1 counter on an Army you control. It's also a Zombie. If you don't control an Army, create a 0/0 black Zombie Army creature token first.) You and permanents you control gain hexproof until end of turn. (You and they can't be the targets of spells or abilities your opponents control.)

Instant
Lazotep Plating (scd) 57
1
Orcish Medicine

Target creature gains your choice of lifelink or indestructible until end of turn. Amass Orcs 1. (Put a +1/+1 counter on an Army you control. It's also an Orc. If you don't control an Army, create a 0/0 black Orc Army creature token first.)

Instant
Orcish Medicine (ltr) 104
1
Saruman's Trickery

Counter target spell. Amass Orcs 1. (Put a +1/+1 counter on an Army you control. It's also an Orc. If you don't control an Army, create a 0/0 black Orc Army creature token first.)

Instant
Saruman's Trickery (ltr) 68
1

Land

Quantity: 37Price: $42.49
Barad-dûr

Barad-dûr enters the battlefield tapped unless you control a legendary creature. {T}: Add {B}. {X}{X}{B}, {T}: Amass Orcs X. Activate only if a creature died this turn.

Land
Barad-dûr (ltr) 340
1
Command Tower

{T}: Add one mana of any color in your commander's color identity.

Land
Command Tower (cmm) 420
1
Crypt of the Eternals

When Crypt of the Eternals enters the battlefield, you gain 1 life. {T}: Add {C}. {1}, {T}: Add {U}, {B}, or {R}.

Land
Crypt of the Eternals (hou) 169
1
Island

({T}: Add {U}.)

Land
Island (woe) 263
11
Mountain

({T}: Add {R}.)

Land
Mountain (woe) 265
11
Swamp

({T}: Add {B}.)

Land
Swamp (woe) 264
11
Xander's Lounge

({T}: Add {U}, {B}, or {R}.) Xander's Lounge enters the battlefield tapped. Cycling {3} ({3}, Discard this card: Draw a card.)

Land
Xander's Lounge (snc) 260
1

Planeswalker

Quantity: 2Price: $3.98
Angrath, Captain of Chaos

Creatures you control have menace. −2: Amass Zombies 2. (Put two +1/+1 counters on an Army you control. It's also a Zombie. If you don't control an Army, create a 0/0 black Zombie Army creature token first.)

Planeswalker
Angrath, Captain of Chaos (plst) WAR-227
1
Nicol Bolas, Dragon-God

Nicol Bolas, Dragon-God has all loyalty abilities of all other planeswalkers on the battlefield. +1: You draw a card. Each opponent exiles a card from their hand or a permanent they control. −3: Destroy target creature or planeswalker. −8: Each opponent who doesn't control a legendary creature or planeswalker loses the game.

Planeswalker
Nicol Bolas, Dragon-God (war) 207
1

Sorcery

Quantity: 17Price: $32.85
Apex of Power

Exile the top seven cards of your library. Until end of turn, you may cast spells from among them. If this spell was cast from your hand, add ten mana of any one color.

Sorcery
Apex of Power (afc) 114
1
Cruel Ultimatum

Target opponent sacrifices a creature, discards three cards, then loses 5 life. You return a creature card from your graveyard to your hand, draw three cards, then gain 5 life.

Sorcery
Cruel Ultimatum (e01) 82
1
Extract from Darkness

Each player mills two cards. Then you put a creature card from a graveyard onto the battlefield under your control.

Sorcery
Extract from Darkness (2x2) 210
1
Foray of Orcs

Amass Orcs 2. When you do, Foray of Orcs deals X damage to target creature an opponent controls, where X is the amassed Army's power. (To amass Orcs 2, put two +1/+1 counters on an Army you control. It's also an Orc. If you don't control an Army, create a 0/0 black Orc Army creature token first.)

Sorcery
Foray of Orcs (ltr) 417
1
Hour of Devastation

All creatures lose indestructible until end of turn. Hour of Devastation deals 5 damage to each creature and each non-Bolas planeswalker.

Sorcery
Hour of Devastation (hou) 97
1
Invade the City

Amass Zombies X, where X is the number of instant and sorcery cards in your graveyard. (Put X +1/+1 counters on an Army you control. It's also a Zombie. If you don't control an Army, create a 0/0 black Zombie Army creature token first.)

Sorcery
Invade the City (plst) WAR-201
1
Mordor Muster

You draw a card and you lose 1 life. Amass Orcs 1. (Put a +1/+1 counter on an Army you control. It's also an Orc. If you don't control an Army, create a 0/0 black Orc Army creature token first.)

Sorcery
Mordor Muster (ltr) 96
1
Slave of Bolas

Gain control of target creature. Untap that creature. It gains haste until end of turn. Sacrifice it at the beginning of the next end step.

Sorcery
Slave of Bolas (plst) E01-86
1
Surrounded by Orcs

Amass Orcs 3, then target player mills X cards, where X is the amassed Army's power. (To amass Orcs 3, put three +1/+1 counters on an Army you control. It's also an Orc. If you don't control an Army, create a 0/0 black Orc Army creature token first.)

Sorcery
Surrounded by Orcs (ltr) 73
1
Swarming of Moria

Create a Treasure token. (It's an artifact with "{T}, Sacrifice this artifact: Add one mana of any color.") Amass Orcs 2. (Put two +1/+1 counters on an Army you control. It's also an Orc. If you don't control an Army, create a 0/0 black Orc Army creature token first.)

Sorcery
Swarming of Moria (ltr) 150
1
The Elderspell

Destroy any number of target planeswalkers. Choose a planeswalker you control. Put two loyalty counters on it for each planeswalker destroyed this way.

Sorcery
The Elderspell (war) 89
1
Too Greedily, Too Deep

Put target creature card from a graveyard onto the battlefield under your control. That creature deals damage equal to its power to each other creature.

Sorcery
Too Greedily, Too Deep (ltc) 72
1
Torment of Hailfire

Repeat the following process X times. Each opponent loses 3 life unless that player sacrifices a nonland permanent or discards a card.

Sorcery
Torment of Hailfire (plst) HOU-77
1
Treason of Isengard

Put up to one target instant or sorcery card from your graveyard on top of your library. Amass Orcs 2. (To amass Orcs 2, put two +1/+1 counters on an Army you control. It's also an Orc. If you don't control an Army, create a 0/0 black Orc Army creature token first.)

Sorcery
Treason of Isengard (ltr) 74
1
Wake the Dragon

Create a 6/6 black and red Dragon creature token with flying, menace, and "Whenever this creature deals combat damage to a player, gain control of target artifact that player controls." Flashback {6}{B}{R} (You may cast this card from your graveyard for its flashback cost. Then exile it.)

Sorcery
Wake the Dragon (ltc) 74
1
Widespread Brutality

Amass Zombies 2, then the Army you amassed deals damage equal to its power to each non-Army creature. (To amass Zombies 2, put two +1/+1 counters on an Army you control. It's also a Zombie. If you don't control an Army, create a 0/0 black Zombie Army creature token first.)

Sorcery
Widespread Brutality (war) 226
1
Wit's End

Target player discards their hand.

Sorcery
Wit's End (m13) 117
1

Deck Stats

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Description

{"ops":[{"insert":"\"Why are there so many armies uptown\" don't worry about it don quixote\n"}]}
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