Guff Rewrites History

For each player, choose target nonenchantment, nonland permanent that player controls. Those permanents' owners shuffle them into their libraries. Each player who controlled one of those permanents exiles cards from the top of their library until they exile a nonland card, then puts the rest on the bottom of their library in a random order. Each player may cast the nonland card they exiled without paying its mana cost.

Arcane Signet

{T}: Add one mana of any color in your commander's color identity.

Tibalt's Trickery

Counter target spell. Choose 1, 2, or 3 at random. Its controller mills that many cards, then exiles cards from the top of their library until they exile a nonland card with a different name than that spell. They may cast that card without paying its mana cost. Then they put the exiled cards on the bottom of their library in a random order.

Spitfire Bastion

(Transforms from Vance's Blasting Cannons.)
{T}: Add {R}.
{2}{R}, {T}: Spitfire Bastion deals 3 damage to any target.

Vance's Blasting Cannons

At the beginning of your upkeep, exile the top card of your library. If it's a nonland card, you may cast that card this turn.
Whenever you cast your third spell in a turn, you may transform Vance's Blasting Cannons.

Vance's Blasting Cannons // Spitfire Bastion

Professional Face-Breaker

Menace
Whenever one or more creatures you control deal combat damage to a player, create a Treasure token.
Sacrifice a Treasure: Exile the top card of your library. You may play that card this turn.

Iron Myr

Reckless Impulse

Exile the top two cards of your library. Until the end of your next turn, you may play those cards.

Tavern Brawler

Commander creatures you own have "At the beginning of your upkeep, exile the top card of your library. This creature gets +X/+0 until end of turn, where X is that card's mana value. You may play that card this turn."

Commune with Lava

Exile the top X cards of your library. Until the end of your next turn, you may play those cards.

Connecting the Dots

Whenever a creature you control attacks, exile the top card of your library face down. (You can't look at it.)
{1}{R}, Discard your hand, Sacrifice Connecting the Dots: Put all cards exiled with Connecting the Dots into their owners' hands.

Keeper of Secrets

First strike, haste
Symphony of Pain — Whenever you cast a spell from anywhere other than your hand, Keeper of Secrets deals damage equal to that spell's mana value to target opponent.

Kediss, Emberclaw Familiar

Whenever a commander you control deals combat damage to an opponent, it deals that much damage to each other opponent.
Partner (You can have two commanders if both have partner.)

Chandra, Torch of Defiance

+1: Exile the top card of your library. You may cast that card. If you don't, Chandra, Torch of Defiance deals 2 damage to each opponent.
+1: Add {R}{R}.
−3: Chandra, Torch of Defiance deals 4 damage to target creature.
−7: You get an emblem with "Whenever you cast a spell, this emblem deals 5 damage to any target."

The Reaver Cleaver

Equipped creature gets +1/+1 and has trample and "Whenever this creature deals combat damage to a player or planeswalker, create that many Treasure tokens."
Equip {3}

Embercleave

Flash
This spell costs {1} less to cast for each attacking creature you control.
When Embercleave enters the battlefield, attach it to target creature you control.
Equipped creature gets +1/+1 and has double strike and trample.
Equip {3}

Command Beacon

{T}: Add {C}.
{T}, Sacrifice Command Beacon: Put your commander into your hand from the command zone.

Nykthos, Shrine to Nyx

{T}: Add {C}.
{2}, {T}: Choose a color. Add an amount of mana of that color equal to your devotion to that color. (Your devotion to a color is the number of mana symbols of that color in the mana costs of permanents you control.)

Blasphemous Act

This spell costs {1} less to cast for each creature on the battlefield.
Blasphemous Act deals 13 damage to each creature.

Runaway Steam-Kin

Whenever you cast a red spell, if Runaway Steam-Kin has fewer than three +1/+1 counters on it, put a +1/+1 counter on Runaway Steam-Kin.
Remove three +1/+1 counters from Runaway Steam-Kin: Add {R}{R}{R}.

Pyroblast

Choose one —
• Counter target spell if it's blue.
• Destroy target permanent if it's blue.

Neheb, the Eternal

Afflict 3 (Whenever this creature becomes blocked, defending player loses 3 life.)
At the beginning of your postcombat main phase, add {R} for each 1 life your opponents have lost this turn.

Red Elemental Blast

Choose one —
• Counter target blue spell.
• Destroy target blue permanent.

Swiftfoot Boots

Equipped creature has hexproof and haste. (It can't be the target of spells or abilities your opponents control.)
Equip {1}

Embrace the Unknown

Exile the top two cards of your library. Until the end of your next turn, you may play those cards.
Retrace (You may cast this card from your graveyard by discarding a land card in addition to paying its other costs.)

Kami of Celebration

Whenever a modified creature you control attacks, exile the top card of your library. You may play that card this turn. (Equipment, Auras you control, and counters are modifications.)
Whenever you cast a spell from exile, put a +1/+1 counter on target creature you control.

Mines of Moria

Mines of Moria enters the battlefield tapped unless you control a legendary creature.
{T}: Add {R}.
{3}{R}, {T}, Exile three cards from your graveyard: Create two Treasure tokens.

Temple of the False God

{T}: Add {C}{C}. Activate only if you control five or more lands.

Throes of Chaos

Cascade (When you cast this spell, exile cards from the top of your library until you exile a nonland card that costs less. You may cast it without paying its mana cost. Put the exiled cards on the bottom in a random order.)
Retrace (You may cast this card from your graveyard by discarding a land card in addition to paying its other costs.)

Tectonic Giant

Whenever Tectonic Giant attacks or becomes the target of a spell an opponent controls, choose one —
• Tectonic Giant deals 3 damage to each opponent.
• Exile the top two cards of your library. Choose one of them. Until the end of your next turn, you may play that card.

Plargg and Nassari

At the beginning of your upkeep, each player exiles cards from the top of their library until they exile a nonland card. An opponent chooses a nonland card exiled this way. You may cast up to two spells from among the other cards exiled this way without paying their mana costs.

Ruby Medallion

Red spells you cast cost {1} less to cast.

Magmatic Channeler

As long as there are four or more instant and/or sorcery cards in your graveyard, Magmatic Channeler gets +3/+1.
{T}, Discard a card: Exile the top two cards of your library, then choose one of them. You may play that card this turn.

Etali, Primal Storm

Whenever Etali, Primal Storm attacks, exile the top card of each player's library, then you may cast any number of spells from among those cards without paying their mana costs.

March of Reckless Joy

As an additional cost to cast this spell, you may exile any number of red cards from your hand. This spell costs {2} less to cast for each card exiled this way.
Exile the top X cards of your library. You may play up to two of those cards until the end of your next turn.

Blazing Crescendo

Target creature gets +3/+1 until end of turn.
Exile the top card of your library. Until the end of your next turn, you may play that card.

Sword of the Animist

Equipped creature gets +1/+1.
Whenever equipped creature attacks, you may search your library for a basic land card, put it onto the battlefield tapped, then shuffle.
Equip {2}

Sol Ring

Rogue's Passage

{T}: Add {C}.
{4}, {T}: Target creature can't be blocked this turn.

Light Up the Stage

Spectacle {R} (You may cast this spell for its spectacle cost rather than its mana cost if an opponent lost life this turn.)
Exile the top two cards of your library. Until the end of your next turn, you may play those cards.

Wrenn's Resolve

Mountain

War Room

{T}: Add {C}.
{3}, {T}, Pay life equal to the number of colors in your commanders' color identity: Draw a card.

Valakut Exploration

Landfall — Whenever a land enters the battlefield under your control, exile the top card of your library. You may play that card for as long as it remains exiled.
At the beginning of your end step, if there are cards exiled with Valakut Exploration, put them into their owner's graveyard, then Valakut Exploration deals that much damage to each opponent.

Rose, Cutthroat Raider

First strike
Raid — At end of combat on your turn, if you attacked this turn, create a Junk token for each opponent you attacked. (It's an artifact with "{T}, Sacrifice this artifact: Exile the top card of your library. You may play that card this turn. Activate only as a sorcery.")
Whenever you sacrifice a Junk, add {R}.

Whispersilk Cloak

Equipped creature can't be blocked and has shroud. (It can't be the target of spells or abilities.)
Equip {2}

Chandra, Fire Artisan

Whenever one or more loyalty counters are removed from Chandra, Fire Artisan, she deals that much damage to target opponent or planeswalker.
+1: Exile the top card of your library. You may play it this turn.
−7: Exile the top seven cards of your library. You may play them this turn.

Chandra's Ignition

Target creature you control deals damage equal to its power to each other creature and each opponent.

Vandalblast

Destroy target artifact you don't control.
Overload {4}{R} (You may cast this spell for its overload cost. If you do, change "target" in its text to "each.")

Basilisk Collar

Equipped creature has deathtouch and lifelink.
Equip {2}

Anzrag's Rampage

Destroy all artifacts you don't control, then exile the top X cards of your library, where X is the number of artifacts that were put into graveyards from the battlefield this turn. You may put a creature card exiled this way onto the battlefield. It gains haste. Return it to your hand at the beginning of the next end step.

Bolt Bend

This spell costs {3} less to cast if you control a creature with power 4 or greater.
Change the target of target spell or ability with a single target.

Ignite the Future

Exile the top three cards of your library. Until the end of your next turn, you may play those cards. If this spell was cast from a graveyard, you may play cards this way without paying their mana costs.
Flashback {7}{R} (You may cast this card from your graveyard for its flashback cost. Then exile it.)

Laelia, the Blade Reforged

Haste
Whenever Laelia, the Blade Reforged attacks, exile the top card of your library. You may play that card this turn.
Whenever one or more cards are put into exile from your library and/or your graveyard, put a +1/+1 counter on Laelia.

Bonehoard Dracosaur

Flying, first strike
At the beginning of your upkeep, exile the top two cards of your library. You may play them this turn. If you exiled a land card this way, create a 3/1 red Dinosaur creature token. If you exiled a nonland card this way, create a Treasure token.

Darksteel Plate

Indestructible
Equipped creature has indestructible.
Equip {2}

Blackblade Reforged

Equipped creature gets +1/+1 for each land you control.
Equip legendary creature {3}
Equip {7}

Atsushi, the Blazing Sky

Flying, trample
When Atsushi, the Blazing Sky dies, choose one —
• Exile the top two cards of your library. Until the end of your next turn, you may play those cards.
• Create three Treasure tokens.

Mana Geyser

Add {R} for each tapped land your opponents control.

Wild Wasteland

Skip your draw step.
At the beginning of your upkeep, exile the top two cards of your library. You may play those cards this turn.

Mind Stone

{T}: Add {C}.
{1}, {T}, Sacrifice Mind Stone: Draw a card.

Seething Song

Passionate Archaeologist

Commander creatures you own have "Whenever you cast a spell from exile, this creature deals damage equal to that spell's mana value to target opponent."

Jeska's Will

Choose one. If you control a commander as you cast this spell, you may choose both instead.
• Add {R} for each card in target opponent's hand.
• Exile the top three cards of your library. You may play them this turn.

Harnfel, Horn of Bounty

Discard a card: Exile the top two cards of your library. You may play those cards this turn.

Birgi, God of Storytelling

Whenever you cast a spell, add {R}. Until end of turn, you don't lose this mana as steps and phases end.
Creatures you control can boast twice during each of your turns rather than once.

Birgi, God of Storytelling // Harnfel, Horn of Bounty

Outpost Siege

As Outpost Siege enters the battlefield, choose Khans or Dragons.
• Khans — At the beginning of your upkeep, exile the top card of your library. Until end of turn, you may play that card.
• Dragons — Whenever a creature you control leaves the battlefield, Outpost Siege deals 1 damage to any target.

Wild-Magic Sorcerer

The first spell you cast from exile each turn has cascade. (When you cast your first spell from exile, exile cards from the top of your library until you exile a nonland card that costs less. You may cast it without paying its mana cost. Put the exiled cards on the bottom of your library in a random order.)

Inti, Seneschal of the Sun

Whenever you attack, you may discard a card. When you do, put a +1/+1 counter on target attacking creature. It gains trample until end of turn.
Whenever you discard one or more cards, exile the top card of your library. You may play that card until your next end step.

Sword of Forge and Frontier

Equipped creature gets +2/+2 and has protection from red and from green.
Whenever equipped creature deals combat damage to a player, exile the top two cards of your library. You may play those cards this turn. You may play an additional land this turn.
Equip {2}

Spinerock Knoll

Hideaway 4 (When this land enters the battlefield, look at the top four cards of your library, exile one face down, then put the rest on the bottom in a random order.)
Spinerock Knoll enters the battlefield tapped.
{T}: Add {R}.
{R}, {T}: You may play the exiled card without paying its mana cost if an opponent was dealt 7 or more damage this turn.

Lightning Greaves

Equipped creature has haste and shroud. (It can't be the target of spells or abilities.)
Equip {0}

Dire Fleet Daredevil

First strike
When Dire Fleet Daredevil enters the battlefield, exile target instant or sorcery card from an opponent's graveyard. You may cast it this turn, and mana of any type can be spent to cast that spell. If that spell would be put into a graveyard, exile it instead.

Valakut Stoneforge

Valakut Stoneforge enters the battlefield tapped.
{T}: Add {R}.

Valakut Awakening

Put any number of cards from your hand on the bottom of your library, then draw that many cards plus one.

Valakut Awakening // Valakut Stoneforge

Urabrask, Heretic Praetor

Haste
At the beginning of your upkeep, exile the top card of your library. You may play it this turn.
At the beginning of each opponent's upkeep, the next time they would draw a card this turn, instead they exile the top card of their library. They may play it this turn.

Chaos Warp

The owner of target permanent shuffles it into their library, then reveals the top card of their library. If it's a permanent card, they put it onto the battlefield.